That We May Know the Love of Christ That Surpasses Knowledge
We have heard it said, God loves you. But most do not believe it. They agree with it in theory. They will say it in prayer, they will sing it in worship, they will quote it to others when needed. But in the deep places of their soul, they do not actually know it. It has not gripped them. It has not broken them. It has not become their foundation. And because they do not know it, they cannot trust it. And when love is not trusted, then the lie always shouts louder than the truth.
Paul says in Ephesians 3 verse 19, that you may know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge. Not just know about it. Not just sing about it. Not memorize verses about it. But actually know it. Feel it. Live in it. Be ruined by it. That word “know” is not casual. It is intimate. It is personal. It is experiential. And if you do not know it in that way, then everything else in your life will try to fill the gap.
When you do not know the love of Christ, you will try to get love from everything else. You will try to earn it, deserve it, chase it, manipulate it, compromise for it, and beg for it. Because the human heart was made to be filled by love. But if Christ’s love is not what fills you, then brokenness will. Then addiction will. Then insecurity will. Then religion will. Because love that is not known will be replaced by whatever voice screams the loudest.
And here is the raw truth. Many in the Church do not know the love of Christ. They know doctrine. They know theology. They know church culture. But they do not know His love. Not the kind that shatters walls and heals childhood wounds. Not the kind that washes away shame and ends striving. Not the kind that enters the room and makes you fall to your knees and weep because you finally feel safe.
See, when love is not known, it becomes negotiable. It becomes a theory. A theological idea. A phrase we say but not a Person we encounter. And when it is negotiable, it is no longer strong enough to confront the torment in your mind or the trauma in your past. And so now, even though you believe in God, you do not believe He could actually love you. Not really. Not with the mess you have made. Not with what you have hidden. Not with how inconsistent you feel. So you keep showing up in His house with your heart locked behind a door you do not know how to open.
But that is the love Paul was talking about. The love that surpasses knowledge. It goes beyond understanding. It goes past your history. Past your mistakes. Past your logic. It is not the kind of love you earn, it is the kind of love that ruins you until you stop performing and just receive it.
You can know all the right verses and still be tormented. You can be in ministry and still be convinced that God is disappointed in you. You can have perfect Sunday attendance and still be convinced that love is something you have to work for. But the moment the love of Christ becomes your identity, everything changes.
When you know His love, you stop performing. You stop comparing. You stop striving. You stop negotiating your worth. You stop begging for affirmation from people who are just as broken as you. Because the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge rewires your entire existence.
It teaches you that you are not a project, you are a son. You are not a burden, you are a joy. You are not a disappointment, you are the delight of His heart. But if that sounds too good to be true, it just means you have been discipled by fear more than you have been fathered by love.
The religious spirit will never let you rest. It will push you to prove something to God that He already settled on the cross. But the Spirit of sonship will pull you into His presence, not because you earned it, but because you were always His. That is what the enemy hates. He does not mind you getting smarter in theology if it means you never feel safe in the presence of God. Because he knows, once you feel safe, you will stop hiding. Once you feel safe, you will stop settling. Once you feel safe, you will start living.
But to get there, you have to let the love of Christ speak louder than everything else.
You have to let it speak louder than the voice of your father who never said I am proud of you. You have to let it speak louder than the abuse that convinced you that you were worthless. You have to let it speak louder than the church wounds that made you feel like a liability. You have to let it speak louder than the shame that wakes you up in the middle of the night. Because if love is not louder, then something else will always define you.
And this is what I have seen. People who do not know the love of Christ are always defensive. They are always working. Always proving. Always exhausted. Always half in and half out. But when love finds them, when they finally let it in, it wrecks them. It dismantles every lie and every mask. And that is what we need. Not more information. Not more behavior management. We need sons and daughters who have been broken by love and rebuilt by the truth that they are wanted.
You cannot be transformed by a love you have never received. You cannot walk in boldness while still being afraid that God might walk away. You cannot live in peace while trying to earn a seat at a table where your name was already written.
And the truth is, some of you reading this have never let yourself be loved. You have only let yourself be used. You serve. You lead. You give. But you do not know how to be loved without doing something to justify it. And I am telling you now, that is not the love of Christ. That is religion dressed in servanthood.
The love of Christ does not need your résumé. It does not need your record. It does not need your consistency. It just needs your surrender. It needs your yes. It needs you to stop trying to be lovable and finally accept that you are.
So here is my question. Do you know His love, or have you just heard of it?
If you still think you are too dirty, too far gone, too inconsistent, too much of a failure, then you have not yet encountered the kind of love that surpasses knowledge. And that is not a rebuke. That is a divine invitation. It is an invitation to let the One who formed you in eternity remind your soul who you have always been to Him.
You are not just tolerated. You are not on probation. You are not a disappointment He is enduring. You are the joy set before Him. The one He bled for. The one He conquered hell for. The one He is coming back for.
The goal is not to get smarter in the Word. The goal is to be consumed by the love of the Word made flesh.
So stop trying to fix yourself and start letting Him possess you. Stop holding love at a distance because it does not make sense. It is not supposed to. It surpasses knowledge. Let it override your theology. Let it destroy your suspicion. Let it heal the little child in you that never felt safe.
Because once love speaks louder than your wounds, you will stop needing to be right, to be first, to be validated, or to be seen. You will just want to dwell in the One who sees you already.
And from there, beloved, you will stop being impressed by darkness.
You will stop being manipulated by emotions.
You will stop measuring your spiritual life by your behavior and start measuring it by your proximity to His love.
Because when you know you are loved, the war is over.
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